There are some difficult life problems that we wish we had special magical buttons to help solve. Unfortunately, there is no such thing. But some psychological tricks can help you deal with difficulties, fix your relationships with other people, and find peace of mind.
Bright Side has found the secrets that you can start using in your everyday life right after reading this article. The tricks will definitely make your life easier.
In order to have support from someone in the future, ask them for a small favor today.
Once upon a time, Benjamin Franklin decided to win the trust of a person that didn’t like him. This person could have an influence on his political career and had a huge library. Franklin wrote a very polite letter where he asked the man for a favor — to lend him a rare book for a couple of days. The book was sent immediately. Soon after that, the famous politician returned it with a thank-you note. And the next time they met, the book lover approached Franklin and they became friends.
As the politician wrote in his autobiography later, “someone who once did something nice for you is more likely to help you again later.” This is the point of the effect. How can you use it in real life?
You can ask a person you barely know for a small favor. For example, ask them to borrow a pencil or a pen. After this, the chances that this person will do something bigger for you are way higher. And if a colleague dislikes you, you can ask them for their opinion on some important matter. This will be a good foundation for your future relationship.
Use just one word to find out if someone likes you or not.
You don’t need to ask a direct question to find out if a person likes you or not. All you need to do is choose a specific wordand every time the person says it or its synonym, you can nod and smile. If the person likes you, they will start using this word more and more often.
Chew bubble gum to calm down.
According to scientific research, this process decreases the level of cortisol (the stress hormone) dramatically. There are several possible explanations for this. One of them is that the blood rushes to the head and you become more relaxed. Another says it is because of our pleasant associations with food and chewing that make us happier and calmer.
Besides, chewing gum can help distract us and get rid of bad habits like eating when we are stressed or biting our nails.
Tell someone a secret to improve your relationship.
A good way to win someone’s trust is to share a secret with them. Of course, you shouldn’t tell them something really important, especially if your goal is to just build a good relationship. It’s important to show this person that you trust them and that you think that it’s important that they know something. This way they will feel that they are connected to you through something important.
Offer someone 2 options to get what you want.
If you need a person to choose or do something that they don’t really want to do, just ask the right question. Don’t ask them if they will do it or not. Instead offer them 2 options.
For example, you need to get a report from your colleague. Don’t ask them if they will bring it or not. Ask them when they can give it to you: tomorrow or in a few days.
This is how people feel that they are important and gain the illusion of control over a situation.
Make a mistake to become more attractive.
We always try to avoid making mistakes, mostly because we are scared of being laughed at. However, making a small mistake can make us more attractivein the eyes of others. A mistake makes you a mere mortal, instead of an ideal person. Ideal people are usually feared and disliked.
Other people won’t be scared of making a mistake in your presence, which will make them more comfortable and relaxed. And if they can also point out that you made a mistake, they might even feel better and you won’t be offended. First, you did it yourself, and second, you won the person’s trust.
But don’t overdo it. Otherwise, they might start to doubt that you are good at what you do.
If there are similarities between you and other people, they will like you more.
A lot of people know about mirroring gestures. However, a great effect can be achieved if you verbally mark the similarities between you and other people.
Just think about foreign tourists when they meet a native abroad. Or how nice it is to find out that you studied at the same school as someone else. We have a tendency to like similar people more.
Give compliments every day.
Give compliments and say nice things to people every day. Even if you are in a terrible mood. Even if the day has been really bad.
At first, it will be difficult and then you will get used to it and you won’t have to make yourself say nice things. And this will help other people to like you a little more.
More than that, while you are practicing, you can say good things not only to your friends and colleagues, but also to random people, retail workers, and drivers. These words make other people feel better and create a good vibe.
Don’t overestimate the attention on yourself.
We are used to concentrating on ourselves and so when we don’t look really good in the morning, we think that everyone notices. But in fact, this is not true.
This is called the spotlight effect. We overestimate the importance of our appearance and our actions for other people.
But think about the times when you are out of town. You tend to wear the clothes you feel comfortable in, you don’t spend an hour in front of the mirror, and you eat whatever you want. Other people see you, think this is normal for you, and don’t think twice about your actions or your clothing. So, try to keep this experience and the relaxed and comfortable feelings in mind in your everyday life.
What psychological tricks do you use in your everyday life?